Mery Christmas Specials

Wow is it Christmas eve already? Actually it's not so surprising since I've spent most of this week christmas shopping and preparing presents for loved ones. I havent had much time for merry making this year, and by this I mean that school let out a week before christmas, and by mery making I mean setting up the small tree in my room, decorating, the tasting of different holiday confections and so on and so forth. And I've missed watchign a lot of my old favourite christmas cartoons. Which brings me to the purpose why I am writing this. I (like many people) have a list of some of my favourite holiday cartoons and movies which I watch like clock work every time Christmas rolls around. Allow me to elaborate.
My top Favourite Christmas Specials (in no particular order)

1) A Charlie Brown Christmas
For many of us out there this is a favourite. I thought i'd put this first because I just finished watchign it. I suppose for any Charles Shultz fan this would be a delight, and of all of his specials I think that this one really stands out. Oh sure, "It's Christmas time again Charlie Brown" had it's moments, ("I said Hockey Stick!") but this one really hits the spot with all of the familliar Shultz gags, and all of the great Peanuts characters and the fact that they put the real christmas message in this one instead of some of the "It's about giving" or "being which your family" type messages which are all well and good, but just dont compare to the birth of a savior.

2) A Chipmunk Christmas Carrol
This is probably one of the first specials I ever saw. I still remember the day when my aunt gave us a copy of this one. She caught us singing "Jingle bells Batman smell's" shortly after and threatened that if we ever sung it again she would never bring us another chipmunk tape. She never did! Needless to stay this has been a favourite one of mine for a long long time adn still is. Gotta love those chipmunks.

3) A Christmas Story
For those of you who arent familliar with this one it is the tale of many merry mishaps during the christmas season revolving around a nine year old boy and his family set I think some time in the 1940's held together by the central plot of him desperately trying to get a red rider BB gun for Christmas. The funny thing about this one is that some of the sequences (especially the day dream ones) are quite bizzare, but the characters never seem to notice that, and they them selves are quite normal (all things concidered). I gotta say though, that sequence at the end where the family enjoys a "Chinese Chrismas Dinner" has got to be one of the funniest scenes I ever saw and still gets me laughing. Also for all of you Torontonians out there, yes those are in fact the old TTC busses, the movie was shot in toronto. And for all of you fans of the Canadian Series "Road to Avonlea" the crasy tree man? Thats Ed Lawson who runs the general store!

4) Home Alone (one and two)
How could I not include this one? Even Jewish People have seen and loved it. The funny thing is how the story of a kid brutally bashing two would be criminals becomes a holiday classic. Seriously! This not withstanding it is great fun to watch. I think I prefer the second one more simply because there are more fun sequences like Duncans toy chest, seeing Kevin live it up in the Hotel and of course the secene where the Hotel concierge gets down on their knees and professes love to the tv. Man...this is the stuff holidays are made of.

5) It's a Wonderful Life
If you ever get the chance also check out the Tiny toons version of this, its pretty funny. A few years ago this version of ours was inadvertently taped over, and I've never seen it since, but it was good. Also you will note that in this version, Busters Guardian toon angel is playing homage to Jimmy Stewart who played George Bailey in the original. It is also doing a nice spoof of a character from another one of Stewart's movies.
Y'anyway, back to the main topic. Yeah it's funny to think that no one liked this movei when it first came out. On second thought thought, I first saw it back when I was five and I found it too slow and only rediscovered it recently. I guess the problem back then was it's unconventional style, most of the movie is build up to when George wishes he had neve been born and realizes how screwed up everyone else would be without him in the last twenty minutes or so. I like this because this is probably some of Stewarts nicest work, and the movie is very typical of Frank Capra's work as well, which makes it very enjoyable. Maybe not an old favourite with me but a favourite none the less. Yeah, but how could I make a list of fav holiday movies without putting this lil' gem here?

6) A Christmas Carrol (numerous versions)
Of course every one has tried to get in on their version of this beloved holiday tale, and many of them have been flops. There's the the George C. Scott version (give this one a pass) and the musical Kelsey Grammar version (dont even get me started!) but then there are good ones. One of them is the Muppet version with Michael in the role of Scrooge. What's great about this one is the songs, the humor, and the fact that besides the fact that they are playing opposite a bunch of puppets, the human actors give it their all and give convincing serious performances. Of course Alistar Sims version is probably the one that most of you out their love. Every Christmas eve night my family has watched this one (save last year and this when we watch the Muppet one.) Most of these scenes are word for word with the book (which I just finished reading) and sim gives a great performace, especially at the end where he starts standing on his head, scaring the house keeper and singing "I dont know anything" without once ever stepping out of character. He and Cane are thw two best scrooges I have ever seen.

Yeah that's basically it! Well actually theres lots more such as the original grinch movie, Santa Claus is comming to Town, the Preachers Wife...but too many to list here. So if you haven't heard of some of these movies and specials, trust me, their worth a rent. So what are you doing? Christmas is tomorrow! Go rent some of these, their greeat to wrap presents by. Well bye for now! Merry Christmas!

The Irony is they're PAID to do it! (Or END THE ENCESSANT ADVERTIZING!!!!!!!!!!!)

You know what I dont get? I dont get how companies spend millions in market research and on commericials and still their methods of advertizing they're products suck.
For example, here in Canada we have "Canadian Tire" it's kind of a home improvement tools and gagets store. Their Method of advertizing? The "Canadian Tire Couple." Yes that annoying couple whose lives are based around the bizzare gagets that keep them together. Here is an example of typical diolouge for this commercial:
(Enter scene grey bearded dad and son playing video games together on couch. Mom walks by.)
Mom: Dont let him tire you out!
Dad: Dad I'm actually winning. Come on Come on.
(there is a zzzap noise, from the tv the lights go out.)
Dad: Oh power failure.
Mom: Not a problem. The new master craft portable dark eliminator battery can power any house hold appliances during a power failure. Just hook it up to the tv and instant power.
(dad is at the computer)
Dad: Or you can hook it up to the computer so you can still use the internet.

Excuse me If I'm not getting something here, but usually when the power is out isn't more important to check and see if the phones still work to see if you can call for assistance if you need it, or to stay in touch with relatives to see if they are okay? and of course there is also the possibility of all of the food in you refridgerator spoiling, not to mention the fact that if you have an elctrical heating system you'll freeze, and if you have an electrical stove you'll starve. But oh no. "I need the power so i can continue the video game with my son so I can woop him in his own areana and show him that I'm not some washed up old relic of a geezer, and show him what a man I am." And the internet? Yeah like that'll be any help. "Oh I think I'll go on MSN or AIM and maybe I can check up on people to see if they are okay. Say...none of my contacts are online. I wonder why..." Look Honey! It says there's a powerfailure on the internet. I'm so glad I had this power source gaget , otherwise I never would've known that!
The credibility of the people selling the products leads me to belive that in order to buy one of these products you will have to be a gaget obsessed ignoramus that is more preoccupied with gagets and tools than living or dying! Actually the product itself is not that bad of an idea, and would be handy to have in an emergancy. But come on, how are these idiots on tv going to convice me to buy this product.
Have you seen those Excell commercials where when someone chewing excel gum walks into a place of seclusion they are immidiatley "stocked" by someone else? In one we see a man walk into the washroom on an airplane, and is then followed by the stewardess? Or what about the other commercial in which a swimmer innocently chewing excel enters a change room and is then followed by the towel boy? What I don't get is what are these commercials trying to say? "Chew excel, it will make you attractive" or "Chew excel if you wnat to be molested in a place of privacy?" the gum will do neither,(which is probably a good thing!) so ultimatley what is the message? The people advertizing this products are mentally deficant and they are grossly insulting our credibility? Yeah, pretty much!
And what about those Tampex commercials that assume that men know so little about menstruation that we assume that the product is that meant for human consumption! I mean thats just nasty! How does that help sell the product? "Oh yeah I buy Tapex because it looks like candy!" No one thinks like that, and I pitty the human being that finds this type of advertizing funny.
And what about those commercials that directly target ethnic groups? Have you seen that commercial that targets Indian people, the one selling game cube game?

"Tani was such a good boy growing up. Den he started hanging vith the wrong crowd. Den, one day ve heard him talking about... Mushrooms! Ven ve were kids ve didn't even know what nentendo vuz...sorry!"

Give me a break! If thats supposed to be funny, it's not it's just another tired stereotype. Look at the way the mother is protrayed especially, wearing the stereo-typical sari. "Oh yeah I'm just an immigrant is still mentally living in a Western Perception of what eastern countries really are and I don't a console from a drug!" I mean, I dont get it! How is deliberatly targeting and making fun of an ethnic group going to sell "Paper Mario"? It's just insulting. Here in Canada we have another gem, the "Alexander Keith's Beer Raving Scotsman!"
Yes this Scottish dude hangs around in bars in a tatty sweater and kilt and criticizes the way everybody drinks because he loves the beer so much.

(Scene opens, in a bar, a man is peeling back a label on his beer bottle. Raving Scottsman is seen going over to said man.)

Raving Scottsman: So...You fancy yourself a 'label peeler' do yah? DO YOU KNOW THAT BACK IN THE DAE ALEXANDER KIETH DREW ALL OF THOSE LABELS BY HAND? SO YOU'D BEST BE GIVING THE BREW THE RESPECT IT DESERVES. (points to the mans escort) Who is this?

Man: She's with me

Raving Scott: (to girl) HEY YOU CALL ME!

Yeah that's more or less what an Alexander Kieth's commercial looks like, protraying the scot as a raving drunkard who has nothing better to do than start a fight in a bar over small and trivial matters. Mind you I can see why the advertizing company chose a Scotsman to advertize their product, after all the beer is based in Nova Scotia, which had many Scottish immigrants (among others) back in the day. But the portrayal of the scot is that of a drunkard and a stero-type, unlike that of Scotch characters who are actually admirable. Take Shrek for example, he's Scotch and he may be a green ogre who is dirty and smells like a swamp but he has many admirable traits like not caring what any one thinks of him, determination and caring about those around him. An article published in the "Toronto-Star" of late showed how Shrek demonstated all of the leadership skills of a successful manager. (I know that this is an old debate, the protrayal of such characters, but I am not awarwe of how those proceedings went. If you wish to respond as to your thoughts on such proceedings, hey, that's cool!)
As for other examples of ethnic slander, the list goes on and on. Dont get me started on the Sweedish Ikea guy. I just don't know what to make of it.
In short ladies and gents, advertizers have either run out of ideas, think we are idiots, or think that the best way to advertize a product is just to put any old thing on the screen in hopes that it is interesting. Yeah...commercals suck at the best of times. But now...it's just kinda nonsensical that's all.
Ok take the care there!
Quizically yours,
Undisputed King
(P.S. I'm not a crazy radical ethnic social rights activist or anything, I just hate beign forced to watch crappy commercials!)